January Blues

Recently (i.e. since we moved to Wisconsin), January has been a slump month for me. I suppose some people look at it as a month of new beginnings and fresh starts, but for me that doesn't usually come until spring time. The warm, cozy feeling that the Christmas season brings has suddenly gone, and all I'm left with is the bleak future of two or three more months of cold. February can be just as bad as January, but I'm hoping it will be better this year. We have a busy month filled with visitors and trips, so I'm optimistic that the time will pass by quicker.

Today is a particularly cold day. A bank sign on the way to the gym this morning said it was -2 degrees, but with the wind it felt even colder. It's sad that we have to bundle up so much just for the minute run in takes us to get from the car into the inside of the building. Alice just cowers and yells "Cold! Cold! Run, hurry, run!!"

We had a little time with just Alice the other day while Elsie was at a birthday party. We ended up taking her out for a doughnut date with Mom and Day. I think she enjoyed herself.

Alan and I have five year journals that we write in every night before we go to bed. It's a nice little snapshot of our daily lives and it requires a minimal amount of time and effort to keep it up. The other day, we were stuck inside the entire day. The girls, bored out of their minds, snuck into my room three times that day and caused mischief before I found them. I thought it was just the normal things they do, jump on our bed, pull out all the tissues, unroll the toilet paper in the bathroom, that kind of thing. It wasn't until we went to bed that we discovered the first half a dozen pages of our journals had been colored on. I was furious. It was a good thing the kids were already in bed, because I'm not sure what I would have done. I went to bed fuming and huffing and trying to get a grip. Alan woke up before me and had a little chat with Elsie about it. He asked why she did it and she told him "I just wanted to make Mommy happy". Somehow in her little mind she thought she was helping me by filling in all of the blank spaces so I wouldn't have to. It has been a turning point for me in how I view my child. Suddenly, she not doing all these things that drive me crazy with the intent of driving me crazy. Maybe she's pinning Alice down to rip off her boots so that I won't have to help her with them. Maybe she's brushing all of her crumbs from lunch onto the floor because she's trying to keep my table clean like I want it.

We have had a bout of sickness this last week that just adds to the January slump. Elsie had it first, then Alice caught it. It's already hard to stay cooped up inside, but when they can't even go to the gym and run around with other kids it gets a little unbearable. They are finally on the mend just in time for Alan and I to catch it. At least they feel good enough to be around other kids, so they go play while I get some time to recoup on the treadmill.

We've tried opening up our big unfinished basement and make it a place to play. We've put their bikes and big toys downstairs and I made up a batch of "sand" for them to play with. It's a little cooler down there, but it breaks up the days if we can spend a little time in a "new" place running around.

We were asked to help clean the church building one Saturday. It was so funny to see the girls run around and play "church". They took turns giving talks, singing songs, and conducting the music while Alan and I vacuumed the chapel.

I have started a new hobby to try and bring a little more color and motion into my life. I'm not quite ready yet to share it, but already I'm amazed at how it has opened my eyes. I've started seeing the world in a different light and even, dare I say it, found some beauty in the winter. I have been learning a lot, and the girls are very encouraging and asking me when I will do it more. It is exciting and fresh, and I hope it will stay that way for a while.

We had an unusually warm day of 46 degrees on Saturday. As soon as nap time was over we bolted out the door to soak up as much of it as we could. We took a long walk over to Alan's work to help him set up his new office space and to run around in the wide open spaces.

One day at a time we are somehow making it through this month. Every night as I crawl into bed and push my ice cold feet against Alan's legs I think to myself "one day closer to warmer weather".

And, finally, the A says "aaa".